New year, new/no motivation.

Reasons I don't write:
I don't want to.
I don't like to,
I'm not good at it.
I don't want to write bad things.
I don't want to use up good ideas.
There's nothing to write.
People don't want to read what I write.
I might offend someone.
There is literally nothing I can write without offending someone, somewhere.

I was recently watching a show, hesitant to say which, but maybe should so people can avoid spoilers. Anyhow, there's this idea that everything we do somehow negatively impacts people, right down to buying a tomato, because somewhere along the way buying that tomato supports something bad. So yeah, we could take that to mean that everything we do could potentially hurt someone or support something we don't like. But the show misses the point that if were were never allowed to do something that might potentially offend someone we would be unable to do anything. The show practically takes away free will, saying that no matter what we do we are hell-bound because everything we do is leading us closer to hell.

Here's the thing. We would be headed for hell without the Lord constantly pulling us back. The Lord does not work on a point system. He takes our actions and intentions into account.

You may have heard the phrase "The road to hell is paved with good intentions." The point of that is that intention alone won't do you a thing. "I was planning on-" is useless. Do the thing. If you buy a tomato because you want to feed your family, then the chain of consequences about how that tomato got to you is not what matters. It's the tomatoes future that matters. Not its past.

Yeah, okay, maybe you should be supporting local business and not some cooperate food supplier, but that's not what matters. The Lord doesn't change your passage to heaven based on where you bought your food.

One thing the show does get right is that your actions matter. No one is saved by baptism. How you live matters. I do love the show. You probably know the one I'm talking about. I hope I didn't spoil anything for you.

What does getting to heaven and this tv show have to do with writing?

Oh right, you can't be stuck, unable to write for fear of offending someone. I'm gonna offend someone. And that can be scary. I can think of things I want to write that might make people I love think less of me. And what people think of me matters. I can't be useful to people if I alienate people.

I hope that people know that when I write, I am doing my best to help, not hurt.

Nevertheless, writing is scary and you'll be lucky if you get another blog post out of me before July.

Lucky? Already I doubt that, because who even cares if I write or not? No, I'm not looking for validation. I just think that most of the time I am writing for me, and no one will really notice if they don't see a blog post from me until next year. Whatever. This post is long enough. I wrote something.

Dating is the Opposite of Marriage

It's funny how people say that dating is good practice for marriage. Well, I dunno, maybe people don't say that anymore. But seriously, teenagers don't need to be dating. The only point of dating is to find out if you could marry the other person. Not to find out what type of person you like or are compatible with. Not to just have fun. The purpose of dating is getting to know someone with the intention of marrying them if things work out.

But it really is the opposite of marriage. So I'm gonna use gambling as an analogy for dating. Relationships are not roulette. It's not chance. It's not random. There's a plan. But there's also the problem of throwing in good money after bad. When you've invested a certain amount of time into a person it can feel like you just have to make it work out. You have to stick with it and fix it even if things aren't working. But the truth is that there is zero real commitment. If things aren't working they don't have to. 

You gotta know when to hold them,
Know when to fold them,
Know when to walk away, know when to run.

I'm not saying it's easy to know what's worth holding on to, but there is always the option to fold.

With marriage there is not. And I think that often people get used to dating and then breaking up when things aren't going well, and then thinking that that's how marriage works too. With marriage you're all in. There's no folding once you have a winning hand.

Dating is stressful. Marriage can be stressful, but the nice thing is that the decision has already been made. You're still figuring stuff out, but you're not figuring out if it can work but how it can work better and better.

Marriage is forever. Thank goodness dating is not!

Under The Bridge Where I Used To Sit

Under the bridge where I used to sit,

It flowed so loudly, and now I hear its quietness.

I hear the same familiar sounds, but there are new ones too.

I hear the quiet whispers of gentler waters.

Was it always this quiet, but I just couldn't hear it?

I am listening now.



I took a few moments to try to write rhymes

But the words want to flow like the waters beside me.

There is structure in a creek, but sometimes it cuts a wider path,

Never minding if it’s doing things right.

I want to mind. I want to get things right.

But I also want to be the water that is so full it can’t be contained by a mere creek bed.



Under the bridge where I used to sit.

There is so much more for me than the mud under my feet.

The creek has more than the mud it glides over.

I am full of that life, but only if I choose it.

Instead I sit in my troubles, unable to hear.

I am listening now.



I am reminded of a song,

but the waters weren’t the ones who were troubled,

I was.

I was on the bridge looking down at calm waters.

But I could not hear them over the pounding of my heart.

Now I am still. I am closer.



Under the bridge where I used to sit

I hear the quietest sounds of the water as well as the loud.

Who knew a creek of barely a few feet could hold so much depth?

The water is truth, cutting its way, raging - now flowing gently.

I am listening now. I am listening.

Speak Lord.

My Life Is Based On A True Story

Well, that would be how things happened. I've been kinda keeping an eye on my blog and noticing that I'm nearing my 100th post. But of course, somehow I managed to un-publish one. I don't even know how one does that! So apparently I'm not very blog savvy.

I had great plans that my 100th blog post would be something clever and epic, but it wasn't. It wasn't at all. It might have been one of the most bland things I wrote!

This post however represents the start of my next 100 blog posts!

I started a blog in July. It's been somewhat steady. This year the posts have been slower in coming because I also started a daily hand written journal and so a lot of my stuff just gets written there and I don't come on my blog as often as I used to. Maybe I will write up some of my handwritten ramblings some day.

I recently was looking at some magnets with twippy sayings on them and one jumped out at me: "My life is based on a true story."

Well, as if that isn't the most obvious thing in the world! But then, think about it! Life is for real. And depending on how you wanna think about it, you are writing your own story. Or maybe you prefer to think that the Lord is writing your story. He is of course, but maybe it's kind of a choose your own adventure? We are in freedom to take any path He offers us, or to stray completely from any path at all. We can turn to page 34 or 426, depending on what we choose, or we can forge out own path, burn the book, write a different ending.

But I'm pretty sure that no matter what we choose the Lord foresaw it. So He is writing our story. Or at least righting it. No matter what we choose He will do His best to turn our choices toward use and Him.

Maybe I'm rambling. I know that I am, but I'm just too excited to slow down and organize my thoughts.

I started a blog in July. I've written over 100 posts and I am grateful for the encouragement and feedback that I have received. I really do hope that my blog is inspirational to others and is useful to someone other than me, but I also know that it is useful to me whether others get it or not.

I love to write. I've been writing for as long as I can remember. I REALLY wish that I could find the story of Toodles and Cindle that I wrote when I was like 4 or something.

I have been writing.

When I was 12 I wrote some never-ending, excessively long story about some royal families and all the people falling in love. It was over 300 pages, typed, single-spaced. It was called "The Story" and it got too big to fit on one floppy disk so I had to split the file so that I could back it up. I have so many partial stories sitting in files on my computer waiting for something to happen.

Seriously the only story I ever finished (other than Toodles and Cindles when I was around 5) was a sorta Frog Prince parody called "The Invisible Prince".

I thought it was cute and okay but had some serious problems. This summer one of my friends read it aloud to me and another friend and that moment changed the way I view my writing. It was one of the scariest things to sit there, crimson-faced while my story was being read out loud! I still cringe a little thinking about it. But they were laughing and enjoying something I had written, and I had a little epiphany that maybe my writing was okay. Maybe people would actually enjoy reading stuff I write!

So, through these friends I developed the courage to at least start a blog. It took me a few more months to start sharing posts on facebook and actually letting people read it! But it has been a great outlet for me.

I love a lot of things, but I didn't realize that I could actually be good at any of them. Painting took me completely my surprise! I'm no da Vinci... yet. But I found that I could never become a good writer or a great painter without trying. Practice is necessary, frustrating, and fun.

I enjoy painting, even when the end result looks like a 2 year old painted it. I enjoy writing, even if I misuse "it's".

I enjoy it, so I do it, and I progress.

My life is based on a true story. It's the story that I make it to be. I get to choose my own adventure. And by golly, I'm gonna choose it!

Does God favor the believers?

If God loves everyone, why does He provide more for some and less for others? What is the determining factor in who gets what?

If He wishes for everyone's salvation and happiness why doesn't He save everyone? Well, as I've said in previous posts, perhaps He cares more for our freedom. So does that mean that it is our free choices that determine our salvation?

Is belief all it takes? If we say we believe, if we truly believe, then are we saved?

Does God love some more than others? Does He love the believers more than the non-believers or is He constantly working on every single one of us to bring us closer to Him?

If then He is constantly working on us, what is the determining factor in who is saved and who isn't? It's not God. He would save every single one of us if He could. It is we ourselves then who are responsible for receiving the salvation He is offering us. The question then is how do we receive the salvation that He is constantly offering every single one of us?

I really liked this article (ERT 10 minutes). Outlining how a gift can be free and you still have to do something about it. If someone offers you a gift you still have to reach out your hands to receive it. You still have to unwrap it and use it.

Next question: Is salvation active or passive? Is it a gift that you use or a gift that once you have it just sits there like a pretty painting on your wall? Enriching your life, just because it's sitting in your house? Don't get me wrong, I love paintings and have several in my room that I love. But is that what salvation is?

I just had a thought, bear with me.

You know in Harry Potter? In the book (or movie) the Philosopher's Stone? Hermione reads out of this gigantic book that the stone "produces the Elixir of Life, which will make the drinker immortal" and then explains to Ron that that means you'll never die. But later on when (spoiler alert) Dumbledore destroys the stone Harry asks if that means that Flamel and his wife will die. Dumbledore says that they will indeed, but: ‘To the well-organised mind, death is but the next great adventure. You know, the Stone was really not such a wonderful thing. As much money and life as you could want! The two things most human beings would choose above all – the trouble is, humans do have a knack of choosing precisely those things which are worst for them."

Humans do have a knack for choosing what is worst. True statement!

But back to my main point, which was really inspired by this quote: "Whoever drinks of the water that I will give him shall never thirst; but the water that I will give him will become in him a well of water springing up to eternal life" John 4:14.

Is the Lord telling us that one drink will give us eternal life, or are we supposed to keep drinking the water of life?

Are we supposed to keep accepting God's gift of salvation every day?

The choices we make

I can get bogged down in one single choice I make. Or even some thing that wasn't a choice but an accident or mistake. I'm trying to think of an example. I recently wrote about accidentally hurting someone. It really sucks how caught up I can get in one little thing. Heaping on blame isn't helpful. Sometimes it motivates us to change our ways and become better. We are supposed to hold ourselves accountable for our actions, but we don't have to hold on forever, wracked with guilt, unable to move forward.

I was struck by a beautiful piece of a story written by a friend. (You can read the whole expert here).

"We are not our injuries," she said with a measured voice. "We are not even the choices we make, for we can always make new choices."

That is what it's about, isn't it? Making new choices. Not getting stuck in guilt, but letting it be the spring board into better actions in the future!

Actions and motives

Is blogging unhealthy for me?

Sometimes I feel like blogging is a great outlet for me to verbally process things that might otherwise me spewed at someone's ears. I love writing and figuring out my thoughts through writing. I also love verbal processing and just talking through my thoughts.

These are both really useful for me. But how egocentric are they? I think I worry too much, but sometimes it's good to be aware of my selfish tendencies so that I can shun them.

I write for myself. Plain and simple I need an outlet to write and so I get on my blog and start rambling, and sometimes I hit upon something deep and I do hope that my thoughts could be of use to someone else. But too often I hope that they will be useful for someone else... so that they can understand ME better.

Do I want people to read my blog because I think it will be helpful to them or to me? Do I paint so that other people can admire me and my talents or so that I can bring life and joy to other people?

I definitely overanalyze. Usually after a little "Argh! I'm selfish. Who am I doing this for? What's the point of this or that?" I just step back and think: Is it the right thing to do? Am I serving the Lord? Am I repenting? Am I becoming a better person or a more selfish one? Am I following the Lord? And I doing the right thing?

It is important to notice our motives, but most of all it is important to notice our actions and if the actions are good and moral we should do them, even if we ARE doing them for fame, glory, praise or whatever.

Sure, sometimes we need to take a break from certain actions if we can't find a way to change our motives.

I shouldn't write and write and write and become more self centered and evil as I go, even if somehow my writing IS useful to others. But the real deal is that if I were not working on myself and shunning evils in my life my writing would become worse and worse and less interesting or meaningful to others.

So, long story short, I should keep writing because I think it is useful. And I should continue to examine my motives and shun evils as sins against the Lord.

We do not write in order to be understood; we write in order to understand.

Sharing is scary. I think it's the fear that someone will try to piece together who I am from the things I share.

"What's wrong with that?" you ask? Good question. Because I get to choose what I share, just as I get to choose what I share in a face to face conversation, just as I choose how to present myself with my clothing and hair and everything.

So what is the fear? There is always vulnerability in sharing anything with anyone, but that is the only way we are to be known. And we want to be known, don't we? Is it that we want to craft exactly how we share ourselves with others? So that we don't let some false notion of who we are creep in to the other person's understanding of us? Cause that's totally possible (insert sarcastic voice)!

Therefore writing should be a safer way of letting people in than a conversation. Because you have the ability to stop writing... and think for a moment about how you want to put out an idea from your mind. You can stop in conversations too, but when you write something to share you can stop for days and no one will ever know how long it was between this word.... and the next.

In writing you have the ability to really craft yourself and look at just how you want to present yourself and your ideas to others. So is it really fear than that I'm fighting? Or is it something else? Could it be shame?

Conversations should hold plenty of meaning, but the idea of an article is a well crafted and informed opinion. It's like in college when I would sit down to an exam and the teacher would have a list of essay questions to write down in one of those little blue books. You weren't expected to have your argument fully crafted and beautifully written. But if the teacher gave you the questions ahead of time, then if you didn't do well that was your own fault and you should have spent more time on the questions before the exam.

In college I never cared about my grades, but I did care that my teachers respected me and my work. I was lucky enough to go to a college where the teachers cared so much about their students. My favorite day was when I was walking through the hallways and my professor stopped me, ran back into his office and came back with my paper, flipped open to the last page and showed me that I had gotten an A!

I cared so little for the A, but it meant the world to me that he liked my work and not only that, but also that he was so excited to show me. He wanted to be there.

So why the shame or fear? I think it is the worry that nothing is perfect. I can have a conversation because that's still working through ideas. It's the point of conversing. But in an article I feel like I'm supposed to come to a conclusion. I am supposed to have accomplished something. And I only feel ready to share it if it is perfect.

This touches all areas of my life. For 2017, I created a resolution to learn ukulele.  And to record and share a song at least once a month. So far I've posted at least twice a month. In the summer I started a blog (Hello readers!). I believe that this is my 27th post. For September I decided to paint every day. And to share every day. I've never done oil painting before!

This creativity, I believe, is all in order to get over this ridiculous notion that everything I share ought to be perfect. I post ukulele songs where I make mistakes, or just aren't very polished. I share unfinished paintings and free flowing thought. I have this blog, but I have yet to share any posts with more than a few people because it feels like too big a window into mind.

But so often my writing is an exploration of my thoughts. It isn't usually explaining something to others, it's explaining something to myself. It's exploring a topic so that I can understand my own failings and do better. I just came across this quote and I really like it:

I do not sit down at my desk to put into verse something that is already clear in my mind. If it were clear in my mind, I should have no incentive or need to write about it. We do not write in order to be understood; we write in order to understand. ― Cecil Day-Lewis

I think that's the crux of it. I have a hard time trying to write something in order to prove a point to someone or to enlighten my reader. I write to sharpen my own thoughts. Convincing others of something seldom works anyway. So I just like to share my ideas and I hope that others get something out of it too.

Are all feelings valid?

Are all feelings valid? I've seen a few articles recently about letting kids feel the feels. And some people have said that they don't think it IS valid for kids to be allowed to express all their emotions. But I think it depends on some definitions.

What does "express" mean?

Express - convey (a thought or feeling) in words or by gestures and conduct.

I guess I believe in freedom of speech, but I also believe in consequences. I don't think children OR adults should just be allowed to scream anything.

So, I guess I'd say that humans should be allowed to FEEL the feelings, but not necessarily allowed to express them. Some gestures, conduct or words are just not appropriate. I think everyone realizes that.

When I think about things that I feel, I KNOW that they're crazy, or even wrong. And that can make it so much worse that I feel them. So I would like people to acknowledge my feelings but not to validate them. Some feelings are not valid, but that doesn't mean I don't feel them.

A very basic example is when I get cold. I remember as a kid my brothers saying things like, "It's not cold. I'm not cold!" and I would look down at my arms covered in goosebumps and think to myself "Um, I didn't choose to feel cold. I'm not doing this on purpose, to annoy you. I cannot change the fact that I feel cold. I don't care what temperature it is, my body is shivering!" but I didn't usually say anything. I would just get angry because I couldn't express to them that I couldn't control my body temperature.

But what about emotions? Can we choose what emotions we feel? Do we have control over them? I'd say that we don't have control over the thoughts and feelings that come into our heads and hearts, but we can control what we do with them once they're there.

Someone once said, "You can't choose what thoughts enter your head, but you can control which ones you invite in for tea." The point being that you are not responsible for the thoughts that come in to your head. If you see someone and your thought is "I wanna kill that person," you don't have to make yourself guilty of that feelings you can immediately be like "Ugh! I don't want to think that!" and kick it out of your head. If you sit there thinking about all the ways to kill that person, then you're culpable. You are inviting the thought in for tea. Meditating on some evil.

So yeah, if someone says "I feel ___." The reaction should never be "No, you don't feel that way." That's not helpful and it's not true. You cannot know what another person is feeling. If they tell you how they are feeling you don't get to contradict them.

People often want to make someone feel better so if I were to say to a friend "I feel useless. I feel like I'm not lovable" and he responded in well-meaning kindness "No! You are very lovable and such a useful person" that might seem like a kind thing to say, but all he has done is invalidate my feelings.

I believe that the appropriate response is "I'm sorry that you are feeling that way. How can I help you?" He doesn't have to agree with me. He doesn't have to say that the feelings are valid, but he should acknowledge that I do in fact feel that way whether or not I should.

If a friend were to say to me "I don't feel love for my husband." I should not respond "Yes you do! Let me remind you why!" I should say "Oh man! I'm so sorry. That sucks. I'm sorry you feel that way! What can I do?" Of course I would want to help her remember why she loves her husband, but I think it's important to acknowledge what the other person is feeling before trying to make it better.

So, with adults you can acknowledge, but not affirm feelings, but can you do the same with children?

If a kid falls down and sees that an adults is watching they oftentimes will burst into tears because they want comfort. So I try not to react strongly to a kid falling down. I usually pick them up and cheerfully say something like "Oops! Are you okay?" Gasping nearly always results in the child wailing. Is that wrong? Is that distracting the kid from expressing their emotions? But if they really are okay, it's not really doing them a service to let them wail. And if they are truly upset or hurt (physically or emotionally) is it then okay to let them cry?

I think so, but sometimes if a kid is upset by something like spilled milk is crying really warranted? I  want to be able to tell my kids that that isn't worth crying over. And maybe if they need to cry that other people don't need to hear it. I guess people should be allowed to cry if they want to, but no one is obligated to feel sorry for them if they do.

Another thing I find myself wondering about is saying "It's okay" to a crying child or baby. I used to think that perhaps that wasn't a fair thing to tell them. "You're okay" "It's okay" sounds like it's brushing off their feelings and not letting them emote. But a few nights ago I was holding a crying baby and found myself rubbing her back and saying "It's okay to cry. It's okay." And realized that I wasn't trying to talk her out of crying, I was trying to reassure her that the crying was okay. "It's okay to feel sad."

Because sometimes you just feel sad, like you just feel cold. I can't change how I feel, but I can always choose what I do about it.

Crazy is a good place to be

More crap. I have been holding off writing because I want to write at the shore, because it's beautiful and inspiring. But I have to write, even when it's not inspiring and I am not inspired. Inspiration will only come if I start writing. So even if I'm just writing the crap, I must write.

I'm packing. I'm SO excited for the shore. It's going to be so much fun! All the fun people and dishes and bacon and coffee!

I always pack too much stuff, but oh well.

Plans are crumbling around my ears! I want things to stay sane. I'm going crazy, but it's okay. Crazy is a good place to be sometimes. I just have too many expectations for how things could/should go and when they don't I can get stressed out and angry or sad.

Expectations for the day, when I'm going where, what other people are doing, but I can't control things and that's a good thing.

Then there's beyond my current day and week, and thinking about all my life and the future and not knowing how things will look in a few weeks, in a few months, in a few years. Not knowing who I will still be really good friends with and who will drift in and out of my life.

I hate not knowing things. And I hate not having control. But it's useful and necessary. Knowing the future would suck more than not knowing it. Being in control of my life would be so much worse than not being in control. It's supposed to work this way, and it scares me.

Self expression and fear

Turns out that I'm afraid of everything.

Music choices, clothing choices, hair choices, makeup choices, food choices, movie choices, writing choices, ALL choices. Why must I be so afraid of having an opinion?

But it's not even having an opinion that scares me. I used to have all the opinions in college. I would engage in Facebook debates. I would engage in discussions and arguments with people in college. I still like to toss opinions into a mix, usually they're detached opinions though.

The other day someone pointed out to me that though I have some strong opinions I don't hold on to them with my feelings. We were having a discussion about what is and is not working for us with the church as an organization. I have plenty of opinions, but I just sorta pull the pin, chuck a small grenade and don't have emotion attached to it. This is just my description of what this person was trying to express about what I had to offer. She was complimenting me, and I appreciated it.

But thinking on it now, I think that it's a defense mechanism. I have opinions, but if they're detached from my feelings then I don't have to care about if people reject or accept them. I just let them be. This can be a useful thing, but I think for me it is a wall I put up to protect myself from hurt.

I fear judgment. I guess? Is that it?

I have long been afraid of sharing a playlist. Why? I'm worried that people will not like the music I picked? Or worried that they will judge me by my musical tastes? I have mostly gotten over this fear.

For the most part I don't care if people like my clothes or not. I also got over this one a long time ago. I am fairly used to not caring what people think of my attire. Skirts are not always appreciated. I no longer care. That isn't to say that I'm not touched when people compliment me. I do appreciate that. And I'm hurt if people are unkind too. But the assumed negative judgments are gone. I don't know why I have these assumed negative judgments in the first place.

Why is there so much fear?!?

I am reflecting on a private journal entry I wrote in November 2014. Here are a few excerpts:

"You are being selfish." 

"You're taking the truth and twisting it till it becomes falsity." 

These are words that were spoken to me today. I think it may be the best relationship advice anyone has ever given to me.

And another:

I told a friend that I always want to hear someone elses opinion first, and he called me selfish. Because I'm forcing the other person to be vulnerable first. It IS selfish, and this is where the falsity comes in too. All falsities are linked to some truth, and what I'm doing is taking a truth (that manipulation is bad) and twisting it as an excuse to not really let my emotions engage. I can talk up a huge strom about things I care about, but showing that I care? That's vulnerable and scary, and it is NOT maniuplation. THAT is the falstity!

I can't actually tell at this moment if this makes sense out of context. But it's making sense to me so I'm leaving it in. The point is that I am afraid. And my fear is making me selfish. Am afraid of being vulnerable so I let someone else be vulnerable (even on a minuscule level) and then I shut them down.

An easy, and entirely stupid example is anytime we go to choose a movie. Do I have an opinion? Almost for sure, but I don't often share it because I'd rather get my second choice than deprive someone of their first. Does that make sense? See, it makes sense to me, and it seems noble. And that's where hell comes in. Swooping in, using a true idea and twisting it into something false.

This is why it's stupid, because I let the hells disturb even the simplest of tasks. Choosing a movie should not be a battle between heaven and hell. Or should it? Is everything? No, see, this is the thing: it's taking a small idea and blowing it out of proportion. But sometimes we must magnify the issue in order to see it for what it is. In this instance I can laugh and realize that declaring a decided movie preference is not going to make or break any friendships. And if it were to... those wouldn't be friendships worth keeping if a simple movie choice could bring it down.

See? See how insane my mind is? It's even terrifying letting anyone into this little piece of it. Because it seems so insane when I write an entire journal entry about it. Fear is crushing! So so crushing. So I hide away in a ridiculous little hole and let hell make me feel smaller and smaller until I am nothing. And in being so crushed I become paralyzed by fear and I have to remember to let the Lord flow through me. It is not I who need be afraid. Be still my soul, the Lord is on my side. It is hell that need fear the wrath that I am unleashing. Fear no more! I shall conquer!

One step at a time. Wonderful friends are encouraging me. I created a blog. These posts are public! That's one step. Sharing this post to Facebook? Alerting all the people to it? That is a step I shall one day be able to make, but for now, writing this at all is a step. One step at a time.

To quote a lyric from my dear friend's song:

One drop at a time with patience, trust, and hope
Let the water of life build my strength again

Working on it. One step at a time. Why is it so hard to trust the Lord's own words?

"Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven." Matthew 5:16