Have Confidence

I woke up at like 6:37 this morning. I was hoping to sleep in. I slept for less than 5 hours last night and I thrive on 8. I've been sick for like a week and really tired and drained. By all accounts I should be feeling pretty blah today.

But I feel amazing. Okay, I'm tired. For sure. But I got up this morning and went shopping. As I drove I marveled about how good a thing it is that I do not know the future. I don't know if random thoughts I have are correct or crazy. And that's okay. I went to Whole Foods to get more kombucha because I discovered grapefruit kombucha and it's amazing! I just found out it has sugar and caffeine... that might add to it's amazingness, but anyhow. I went shopping early on a Saturday and as I was coming out of the parking lot I ran in to a delightful father figure who swept me up in the most life giving papa bear hug and said to me "Well my day just got a lot better." And mine had too.

I decided to go to Starbucks for a quick coffee and the parking lot is notoriously crowded. I waited as a lady got in to her car and pulled out. I took her spot, got my coffee and then returned to my car. Just as I had waited, there was a car waiting for my spot. I cautiously backed out, careful not to hit them or any other cars in the over crowded lot. The person leaned on their horn for a good 30 seconds. Not a gentle "In case you didn't notice me, don't hit me." A solid, rude "Get the hell out of my way and don't you dare hit me!!" Kinda honk.

If I had been in a different mood I might have pulled back into the spot and just stayed there for awhile. But I paused, to let the person know that I had seen them, and continued my same cautious backing up, and then I pulled out of the parking lot as the car shot into my vacated spot.

I thought about how on any other day I might have been put in a kinda bummed out mood by that person's rudeness, but as I pulled out of the parking lot my thought was "I already got an amazing hug today, so I don't even need to care about that person's bad attitude.

As I was driving home, grateful for the start of this Saturday, this passage came in to my head:

"Have confidence. Arise. He calls thee." (Mark 10:49)

I feel confidence in the Lord this morning. Confidence for the future and a peaceful contentment in waiting for the amazing future He has planned for me.

Cows and addiction

I can hear cows. Cows this morning, cows as I was falling asleep. Last night I drove an hour round trip just for some chocolate and kombucha.

Part of driving last night was just for something to do. And I also really wanted chocolate and kombucha.

I'm afraid it is quite easy for me to get addicted to things. I didn't use to like coffee. I mean, from a young age I was captivated by mocha's and coffee ice cream. I did like the coffee flavor so long as there was a great deal of sweetness involved too.

But one time in college my professor, entirely joking, told us that coffee was mandatory for our 8am class. I started bringing coffee to class with cream, no sugar. I didn't love it at first, but I didn't hate it either. Within a week or two I couldn't do without it. And it wasn't even the caffeine. I'm one of those people who can drink decaf coffee and be just as happy.

I didn't like the taste of alcohol before I was 21. I didn't much care for the taste after I was 21. Eventually I developed a taste for it and now I enjoy it a lot, but I don't need alcohol and am quite happy without it.

I didn't like kombucha the first several times I tried it. I thought it tasted like apple cider vinegar, which I hate! Now I love kombucha and will apparently drive an hour to get some.

Even developing a taste for alcohol it took me until this year to really enjoy beer. If I drank it at all I wanted the darkest of the dark, smoothest of the smooth. I still don't like IPA! But I will drink a few beers in an evening and be happy.

I wonder if I could do the same thing with olives, pickles, tomatoes, fish and other things I really don't like the taste of. I have tried a few times, but sometimes it just doesn't change until it does. Beer took 10 years. Still waiting on fish.

So, I don't know if I'm really addicted to any of the above, except chocolate. Definitely chocolate! But it's interesting to me how quickly I can go from disliking certain foods to loving them and craving them!

Now I'm cold. My coffee is gone, and my toes are cold. I'm sitting on the most delightful screened in, wrap around porch, and it's so chilly out. I love it. My favorite weather and I love the slow life here!

Cows. I can still hear you.