A Brief Summary

What is happening?! I haven't written in forever and this is only my second blog post in May and it's the 24th! Craziness! Also, the blog post I published in May was mostly written in April. Wow.

I was giving it some thought. It was making me sad, like I don't have time for blogging and that's not cool, but I think it's okay because it means instead of writing about life happening, life IS happening.

I went to Belgium, and also The Netherlands, Germany, and France! All for the first time (unless you count a layover in the Munich airport 10 years ago). Almost immediately upon arriving home from Europe I went to Canada. I've lost track of how many times I've been to Canada, but that was a fun and busy trip. So busy I didn't have time for a blog post or a nap.

Just popping up to Canada to help take care of my niecephews. It was a busy time and upon arriving I felt like the evil dictator aunt who waltzes in and just starts issuing orders! It took me a few days but with some prayer I was able to remember how to connect with the kids and enjoy my time there rather than feeling like I was just trying to keep a machine going. I like order, I love structure, but I can forget that I am a human being and I need to be willing to be flexible. I know that I am useful to them, but I am always blown away by how useful it is to me. It can be hard to see when I am blind with tiredness and up to my elbows in dishes, but after a non-stop two weeks I got in the car to drive home and had some reflection time, and now I've been home for almost a week and have caught up on some sleep and I can now reflect on how useful such a trip is to me.

My life is not my own. And that is a good thing. I need that reminder. I need to let go of the control of my life. But how, in my day-to-day life do I let go of control but not let go of order? Children are a surefire reminder. When you're around children there is a certain amount of predictability but with a healthy dose of uncertainty. I'm not doing a good job describing it, because I am aware of the time ticking away from me and the things I need to get done in the next half hour.

For now, let me just say that children are good for me. Chaos is good for me. Strong willed children are good for me. Having a soaking wet rag flung unceremoniously from the bathtub on to me is a good thing. Deluged with water, tears and hugs is very good for me. Struggling to teach a child a job when it is far easier to just do it myself is good for me. How often does our Father look down and think "It would be easier if I just did it myself"? But He doesn't. Because He knows how useful it is for us to learn it. He can't just do it for us though that would be so much easier.

I re-see the Lord every time I interact with children. Every time I am frustrated and tired I can see in even sharper contrast the Lord's infinite patience and kindness as He lovingly encourages us on our path.