No Agenda

I keep thinking my blog posts have to have an agenda, or cover something, or talk about what's going on in my life. None of those things are wrong, but I created this blog to write. And if I'm worried about filling some specific agenda I don't write.

So today, I am going to write the crap and not care if this post does nothing.

Sometimes I just want nothing.

Life is busy. So many things to do, so I'm avoiding them. Jk. I'm not even. I just paused writing this to send a few more emails and texts and add something to my to-do list. Haha. I can't even avoid anything.

I'm sitting at Starbucks. My eyes are tired. I should probably nap, but if I know me, I won't.

I have to go food shopping. I'm going to visit a friend. I'm going to make dinner. I'm going to chill.

In other news, I think I'm kinda broken. Maybe not, but I've trained myself not to cry for so long that crying when tears press on my eyes feels super weird, but I'm trying to re-train myself and just let the tears come when they push to get out.

So now I cry always. Like way too much. Not about anything either. Pretty music at church? Boom! Tears. Reading TCR? Boom! Tears. Like multiple times. In public!! Thinking about tears? Boom! Tears! Stress in my shoulders creating massive headache inducing stress? Boom! Tears.

All the songs from Wicked are stuck in my head. Not actually, just all the good ones. "Too long I've been afraid of losing love I guess I've lost!"  "And now whatever way our stories end I know you have re-written mine by being my friend!"

Sometimes when I start writing I get on to something and then I write something interesting. This time it's a total random.

Hello world, time to go buy some veggies!